Journaling: My Grown Up Security Blanket

If I could have one magical object from the phenomenal world of Harry Potter, I would choose the pensieve. For those of you who are not familiar with the Harry Potter series, a pensieve is a rare magical object that relieves your brain of detailed memories, and stores them for you so they can be recalled to the necessary accuracy when needed.

While I may never get my hands on one of these rare magical objects, I do have the next best thing: my journal.

I currently have five running journals: my choreography and dance improvisation journal, my voice technique journal, my theatre critique journal, my spiritual journal, and my personal journal, in which I store all my life experiences, emotions, and philosophies. I started my personal journal when I was a freshman in college, and am currently filling up my eighth one, four years later!

I know, I know, I sound a little journal obsessive already. But journaling is the language I speak most easily, and most eloquently. I have found it is one of my favorite, most calming, and most personal things to do.

Well, what exactly is it? It is simply writing down your thoughts. You can journal about emotions, philosophies, or life experiences. These entries can vent negatively, or positively, but the most important thing to remember about journaling is that it is best done without a censor. Letting your stream of consciousness flow onto the paper with disregard for spelling, punctuation, or structure, is the best way to tap into the rawest thoughts and most creative ideas.

I know what you’re probably thinking. Journaling sounds like a lot of work, and like a painful commitment. Well it is a commitment for sure. But journaling is worth it, because it is thought provoking and cathartic. It has intellectual, emotional, and personal and creative development benefits that will improve the quality of your life. And the best thing about it is it is your journal. It doesn’t have to be neat or perfect, it doesn’t have to be a nagging obligation, and you can stop at any time. You also don’t have to journal every day. You can journal every week, every other week, or even every few months! It is only as committed as you decide for it to be. But once you start, you may find that you want to keep going for reasons I am going to display to you.

Intellectual Benefits

Journaling evokes a special kind of mindfulness that comes from actively engaging your thoughts as they come through your brain, rather than just letting them pass through unentertained. Working out ideas on paper helps to stretch your IQ, while the exploration of language to word your thoughts increases your vocabulary (It is because of my journal and my love of reading combined that I now have a dorky note on my phone that lists all my favorite words).

The act of engaging your thoughts in this way also improves communication skills, as tidy thought formulations naturally translate. My favorite thing to think is that you can bore your journal with details before you bore your friends. This “pre-venting” makes a good habit of thinking before you speak. Fun fact: I also find that this is why I can text message my thoughts so well. There is something about the physical act of typing out thoughts that makes you confront and engage them more specifically and eloquently. Sometimes I will even copy out a well thought out text message into my personal journal, because I happened to spill the thoughts there first. So for those of you who are no good at “words-ing,” journaling may be for you.

Emotional Benefits

The emotional benefits of journaling are even more rewarding than the intellectual benefits. Letting your feelings flow freely onto paper yields no consequences but relief; unlike living beings, you aren’t going to hurt your journal’s feelings. In writing these feelings, you are fully forming and establishing thoughts in the translation from you brain to the paper. This clarity of thoughts and feelings organized on paper helps to put life in perspective; it becomes easier to identify what is good or toxic for you, how to resolve disagreements, and track emotional patterns.

Journaling becomes a very healthy outlet to reduce stress, and coping mechanism to help with depression and anxiety. There is a mental and emotional freedom in releasing experiences into words for your journal to keep and not your mind. Because of this perspective, journaling has increased my emotional intelligence, perception, empathy, and understanding of human connections and patterns. For example, because of my journal, I could vent about the times when my professor treated me totally unfairly, the time my seriously committed relationship ended, the countless audition rejections, the time I felt guilty for hurting my friends, or the time a loved friend was taken away from me. My journal became my best friend during times that seemed unbearable. I would have been a lost person without it.

One of my favorite parts about journaling is the increase in self-confidence you can experience from it. Journaling about positive experiences allows your brain to relive those experiences. Like the time I finally got re-cast in a performance role at Disney World after two years of wishing, the time I was walking through campus and the weather felt like a perfectly warm hug and all my evaluations were finished, or the time I drove through back roads with the windows down and music blaring, feeling on top of the word. This reaffirmation “re-releases” the same endorphins and dopamine you felt the first time you experienced it, which boosts your mood again. You’ll get used to smiling at a piece of paper as you healthily relive positive memories.

Personal & Creative Benefits

Since I began journaling, my self-awareness has skyrocketed to probably a professional level. Constantly acknowledging your thoughts really helps you to get to know yourself, and also makes talking about yourself a lot easier because you are so in tune with who you are. Since I have started journaling, interviews are easy. Coming up with a bio for my social media is no problem. And writing or telling about myself on that dreaded first week of classes or job orientation is cake.

Journaling increases creativity too. An uninterrupted stream of consciousness helps the right brain take over, and loosens up the expressive muscles, bringing to fruition ideas you never knew you had. Journaling your raw thoughts helps loosen up mental blocks.

Journaling is also helpful in achieving goals, because goals are more established and set when they are written out and not just floating around in your head. Journaling your goals is like having a blueprint to build a house; it provides a psychological blueprint for you to continually refer to. I scarcely wanted more in this first year that I’ve moved to Florida than being cast in one of the holiday parades at Disney World. I journaled my undying need to be cast several times a week. This constant reminder of my dream held me accountable and drove me to continue to go to workshops and auditions … and pray, until one day I picked up the phone and found out I had been cast!

Journaling is Awesome

Lastly, journaling is really cool! There have been so many instances when I’ve had my face buried in a worn and torn notebook, scribbling vigorously, and people have asked me what in the world I’m doing. I then get to proudly peep my head up and exclaim that I’m journaling. They are always surprised and impressed by the unconventional and antique nature of such a hobby, and it usually starts a great conversation such as the speech I have just had with you!

So, thank you, faithful journal, for always being there to hold all the pieces of my brain that could never all fit into my head. For your pages imprinted with a rainbow of feelings and sympathies and memories. For your hundreds of lines to hold my thoughts and philosophies. For organizing the emotional and intellectual mayhem in my mind into your wide neat lines. Thank you for coming with me everywhere, like my grown-up security blanket and familiar old friend, and for safely keeping my life vomit in your pages.

Though I may never find a magical pensieve to store my memories, I can be sure my journal will be there to hold my thoughts. And keeping with the Harry Potter references … Lord Voldemort wasn’t too far off with the idea of investing a piece of his soul into a journal...

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