Why We're Always Running Out of Time

Welcome to America, where it seems without our permission, our days take the shape of a busy frazzle that allows little time for sleep or leisure. We spend our hours checking all the boxes and wishing we had more hours to check more boxes. We run on a treadmill of never-ending to-do lists. We pride ourselves on saying “yes” to everything because it makes us feel specialized and needed. We kick ourselves for saying “no” because we are afraid of missing out and are conditioned to view saying no as laziness. Our efforts to do more, we think, mark us as accomplished individuals. The less available we are, the more important we must be. The less time we have for humble tasks, the more successful we must be. Goodness knows the less breathing room we have in our schedules the less time we have to think existentially about what we are doing with our lives. Our culture has been effectively deceived into believing the more we fill our lives with things the better our lives will be. But does filling our lives lead to a full life, or are we subconsciously in the business of convincing a vague, general audience that our lives are much happier than they are? 

Understanding Time

Our greatest deficit in this consumer world, it seems, is time. It feels like time is a yarn endlessly unraveling, that we will never be able to catch the end of. If only we had more time to breathe, to administer self-care, to spend with family, or to do what we want to do instead of what we feel we should be doing. But is what we need more time, or cultural permission to spend it differently? Let’s start by understanding a bit about our perception of time. In his reflection on the Psalms, C. S. Lewis writes this:

“The Eternal may meet us in what is, by our present measurements, a day, or (more likely) a minute or a second; but we have touched what is not in any way commensurable with lengths of time, whether long or short. Hence our hope finally to emerge, if not altogether from time (that might not suit our humanity) at any rate from the tyranny, the unilinear poverty, of time, to ride it not to be ridden by it, and so to cure that always aching wound ('the wound man was born for') which mere succession and mutability inflict on us, almost equally when we are happy and when we are unhappy. For we are so little reconciled to time that we are even astonished at it. 'How he's grown!' we exclaim, 'How time flies!' as though the universal form of our experience were again and again a novelty. It is as strange as if a fish were repeatedly surprised at the very wetness of water. And that would be strange indeed: unless of course the fish were destined to become, one day, a land animal.”


What Lewis pinpoints is that we were not made to be constrained by time because we were not ultimately made for this world. We were made for an eternity spent with our Creator and are stopping in this world briefly. We are timeless beings living in a time-limited world. We are designed for extended solitude and simplicity, yet living in a world that tells us “the more the merrier, the busier the better.” It is no wonder we are continually bewildered at what we experience as the scarcity of time, saying “my, how time flies!” and “where did the time go?” We were designed with eternity in our hearts. Experiencing a deficit of time should astonish us because it is counter to our deepest built-in longing. It is no surprise that our time spent in this world feels limited and inadequate when compared with the eternal timeline we are meant for. Like the fish destined for land marveling at the wetness of water, so we marvel at the scarcity of time.  

With our timeless inclinations in mind, we can conclude that we would be no happier if more time were added to our lives, because time in this world is still finite. It is kind of like money in that despite the idea that having more would solve all our problems, we would still find ways to swindle it or fill it with more distractions. What we are truly seeking is not more time, but endless time, a sense of timelessness even.

Reconciling with Time

So how can we reconcile with this apparent scarcity of time while we reside on earth? First, we can use our urge to beat time as motivation to waste no time in doing God’s work on this earth. Second, in knowing that the itch for timelessness will never be scratched on this side of eternity, we can decide to be content with the time we are given on this earth. There is comfort to be taken in the knowledge that the eternity with God we long for will one day be obtained, though it is impossible for the time being. From here we can find resolve in knowing that the time God has given us on this earth is enough because all His provisions are adequate.

To think that there will come a time where we will spend endless undistracted days in God’s presence and fellowshipping with other believers is driving - how divinely the itch will be scratched! Isn’t this life just an appetizer to the main course that is to come? Knowledge of the eternity we will one day take part in motivates us to strive diligently and patiently for these brief years on earth, using our short time wisely, but also not being greedy with it. In doing so, we defy the demands of time to speed us onto the next thing for fear of running out of it. We know that what God has given us is and will forever be enough.

O Lord, my heart is not lifted up; my eyes are not raised too high; I do not occupy myself with things too great and too marvelous for me. But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me. (Psalm 131:1-2)

We may feel the urge to rush through our lives, moving from one thing to the next before we even finish, but don’t we feel that the moments we slow down in life tend to be the happiest? There is clarity in stillness. An uncluttered moment of simplicity allows us to find solitude with God and detangle the web of our lives. I would argue that it works the other way too. Spending time with God seems to slow down time and increase our capacity for solitude. There is a beautiful cyclical nature which opens a warm, breezy window to our eternity when we sit alone with our Maker. As we begin to zoom out and see our lives from an eternal perspective, not only does it make our lack of time seem less problematic by comparison, but it draws us into the conviction that we should be spending the very short and sacred time we have on earth wisely. It draws our focus back to the fundamental things we should be doing in leu of all the menial tasks that distract us from our intended purpose. So why do we have such a hard time finding this focus and simplicity in our busy lives?

Living Distractedly

It is no hypothesis that the enemy lures us into an ocean of chaos and confusion because simplicity is a place he cannot hide. Satan wants us to be continually dissatisfied with the quality of our lives so that we will continue to chase a just little bit more. He hides in the tiny details, and some of his favorite phrases to feed us is “if I just had ___________ then I’d be happy,” or “if I just did this one more thing, then I’d finally be successful,” or “If only this could change, all would be well.” He pulls us away from the core purpose of our existence by distracting us with tiny details of discontent. He capitalizes on our sinful nature, making us greedy for success, experiences, money, and status, and therefore feeling like we are forever in a deficit of resources, particularly time. As long as he can keep us distracted, mildly discontent, and running about, he ensures we spend little time meditating and conversing with our Creator - the path to true satisfaction. If we find clarity in stillness, if we find peace in simplicity, the enemy has lost. So he hangs the carrot and watches us run out of energy. As we wearily crawl into our beds at the end of each long day, we feel that time has escaped us. It is as insubstantial and evasive as water slipping through fingers. Feelings of failure ensue, and cheap temptations are there waiting to bandaid our deep problems. Let us not underestimate the enemy’s genius. Let us be pre-disposed to pick apart the psychology of his methods, notating and discarding until we find truth.

Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. (1 Peter 5:8)

For God is not a God of confusion, but of peace. (I Corinthians 14:33)

If having more finite time to fill with more distractions will not fulfill our souls that thirst for eternity, then why not just do less and stress less? First, let us not equate doing less with being lazy, apathetic, or doing nothing, but rather focusing our time by being selective about what things we let into our lives. Of course we are to work for a living. God intended us to do so, but he also intended us to rest. Do we trust that if we say no to extra hours and side jobs that God will bless our decision with provision? Of course we want to be successful and accomplish much, but what is success if our relationship with our Heavenly Father gets continually pushed aside for what we are culturally appropriated to deem more pressing matters? Are we aiming for the world’s version of success, or God’s version of success? Of course we want to enjoy life and have fun experiences, but are our methods becoming idols and wrong sources of joy? Moderation and balance are key in many areas of life, and the area of time management is no different. For those who are doing too much, I think one of the most heroic disciplines in modern American culture is having the courage to say “no.” If it is a struggle to decide what to say no to, that is a conversation that God would love to be a part of. We need not live in fear that we won’t be satisfied. The God of the universe has promised to honor our efforts to simplify:

But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. (Matthew 6:30-33)

The Dreaded Social Media

There is yet a subject to address in terms of why we overcrowd our lives and hoard commitments that stretch the boundaries of our time. Social media halts us in our tracks toward simplification through the fear of missing out. On social media we are constantly viewing the coolest parts of everyone else’s lives – people traveling the world, buying their dream home, sampling the newest home gadgets and technology with awe, wearing the trendiest clothes in their closet, and eating fancy meals in the most beautiful restaurants. We may have the genuine urge to simplify, but then we are stopped in our tracks by the highlight reels of other people’s lives and feel like ours are inadequate from the start. “Forget simplifying. We need more,” we think to ourselves, as we try to keep up with the speed of this consumer culture. We then become artfully deceived into filling our lives with distractions, hardly even for our own happiness’ sake, but for the sake of our pride – that others might see our social media profiles and know we are on par with everyone else.

When tempted with this notion, it is important to realize that in general people are so busy trying to impress their own friends and followers, they are not really worried about what you have accomplished, unless you have raised the bar with which they now feel compelled to compete. This doesn’t bring life or happiness. It breeds jealousy and dissatisfaction, and perpetuates the cycle of leading a more presentational but unhappy life. If you need cultural permission to stop living up to unrealistic expectations, let me play my part in loudly proclaiming for your sake and mine: Our lives are not a performance! We can use social media healthily for entertainment and keeping up with friends and family, but if we notice an increasing discontent creeping into our lives, or that it is eating up all of our God-given time, let us consider deleting the apps from our home screens, setting time limits for them in our phone settings, or deleting our accounts altogether. The disconnected life is a blissful one, though unfortunately in the age where much work and career-building is done through social media, not always a plausible one. May we pray for the creativity to simplify and claim back our God-given time in innovative and live-giving ways.

Dissatisfaction

It is crucial to pull back the curtain on the world’s empty promises of joy that just steal our time – to realize that the things of this world will only leave us thirsty for more and more every time. When we become thirsty for more things, we become thirsty for more time in which to do and obtain all the things. But neither things nor time are what we are really thirsting for. May we remember instead to come to Jesus, the well of living water, for a drink daily.

It is baffling to think of how spiritually dehydrated we can become. We may use our time to prioritize our physical health by drinking lots of water, getting enough sleep, eating nourishing foods, and exercising. Maybe we use our time to prioritize our emotional health by taking time for ourselves, being sure to spend time with friends and family, and allowing adequate time for rest and leisure in our schedules. We may use our time to prioritize our mental wellness, digging into podcasts and books, and consistently working toward new self-help goals. None of these things are bad. God has asked us to steward the bodies He gave us well. Yet when we look at the health of our spiritual lives, do we see the same wellness routines? The same time commitment? If Jesus is the live giving, ever satisfying water, why do we only take one sip of Him for five minutes in the morning? Why do we allow ourselves to skip out on our quiet time? Would we skip out on drinking water in the same way? Surely we would die if we did. If we are feeling spiritually dead, overwhelmed, or spread thin, it might be time to revitalize our spiritual health. But how do we do that?

Application

Say you have some conversations with God, and you get up the courage to let some things go from your life. Now what? First, don’t fill the new empty spot in your schedule with something else. If you have a productivity addiction, don’t feed it. If you have tendencies toward laziness, don’t turn on the TV. Try finding a nice quiet place and sitting in silence for a few minutes. It will feel scary at first as your life has room to breathe. Taking the time to merely exist without distraction is unnerving and revealing. Now that your brain is no longer on overdrive, you may start to have realizations and creative thoughts bubble to the surface. Let them. Confront them. Ignore the urge to pick up your phone. Do not feel ashamed of your “doing nothing” because of the lies you’ve been believing from modern American culture. Allow yourself time to simply exist in God’s creation, knowing you are not missing out on anything, but showing up for the best thing this life has to offer. Ponder and meditate on Him. Let your thoughts turn into prayers. Rest in the stillness. God wants you to rest. He wants you to experience the beauty of sitting still in His creation. Jesus Himself sought out solitude regularly and we deem Him no less accomplished for it.

Another step toward spiritual health is inciting or increasing your quiet time. Start by taking five minutes in the morning, afternoon, or evening to read the Bible and pray. You may have to train your focus to stop craving twenty second social media reels or wandering off to your to-do list. That’s okay. When your mind wanders, come back to God. He is still there listening. He forgives you for becoming distracted. He even understands. While the nourishment of time with God is slowly discovered, and not as immediately addicting as the world’s hollow candy, the more often you come to Him, the more often you will want to come back. You will begin to feel a deficit of peace on the days you skip out on His sustaining live-giving truth. Let this five minutes a day turn into ten minutes, or maybe five minutes twice a day, then fifteen minutes, and so on.

Maybe you can declare to God that you have decided to make more room for Him and ask Him how He would like you to be more participatory in His plan. Or look through Jesus’ example in the Gospel to pinpoint ways you can act more like He did. Write one down. Be intentional. The enemy would love to place a metaphorical brownie on your kitchen counter in the form of a missed alarm, a dinging notification, a sick kid, or an “I’ll do it tomorrow.” Things happen, and God is not angry if you miss your time with Him here and there, but just think of the spiritual health you miss out on the more meetings with God you forgo. God knows you so well, and He wants you to know Him. Remember spiritual hydration is even more important than physical hydration. Switch to a diet of Him and be unshakably sustained. The more time you spend with Him, the more repulsive and obvious the junk food lies will seem when the enemy wanders in.

Jesus replied, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.” (John 4:13-14)

May we feel encouraged and confident in the high-quality life that Jesus can bring us – a life that has breath, intention, and resilience to the interruptions of this world. Instead of feeling weary, spread thin, and jealous for more time, may we feel eager to do what is important – God’s work – in the short time we have been given. We don’t need to perform. We don’t need to run on the treadmill of life’s distractions. We don’t need to accumulate accomplishments and experiences to make our lives worthy in the eyes of others. God has already deemed us worthy. He has checked our box, given us passage, paid the way. What have we left to earn? Because of the cross we have eternal intrinsic value, regardless of our accomplishments. May we be implored to share this tear-jerking wonderful news with others, so that they may join in on the joy! There is freedom today to live rightly, peacefully, simply, and joyfully. I encourage you, amongst the chaos of a frantic dying world, where all will burn but our souls, to cut the excess out of your life and make room for God to work. Our time is not our own. It is a gift from God. We can add no more of it to our lives, and even if we could it would make us no happier. May we use it wisely, give of it freely, and allow plenty of space for God’s will to be done.

He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God? (Micah 6:8)

For our boast is this, the testimony of our conscience, that we behaved in the world with simplicity and godly sincerity, not by earthly wisdom but by the grace of God, and supremely so toward you. (2 Corinthians 1:12)

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

To wrap this up in an artistic bow, I will quote a poem by my great grandmother, who, having seen more than a century of life, has certainly internalized the idea of savoring each moment that life has to offer us:

Why do people scurry about?

Why do they rush to and fro?

Why do they hurry and push and shout?

Where do they want to go?

We are so concerned with trying to “get”

That we haven’t the time to “give” –

So busy trying to rush through life

That we haven’t the time to live.

What a pity to waste a sunset,

Or a rainbow in the sky.

What treasures we lose in our haste to gain!What gems miss our anxious eyes!

Our Father asks us to trust Him,

To take no thought for the day.

He’s promised to clothe us in beauty

Like lilies in gorgeous array.

But man is ever too busy

To hear what the Master would say.

He’s too busy trying to go somewhere

To know that he’s lost “the way.”

John 14:6 - “I am the way, the truth, and the life.

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Inspirational Sources and Expanded Reading

-       None Like Him; Jen Wilkin; Chapter 5, “Eternal- The God of Infinite Days”

-       Celebration of Discipline; Richard J. Foster; Chapter 6-7

-       The Life You’ve Always Wanted; John Ortberg; “An Unhurried Life”

-       How to Keep Time; The Atlantic; Podcast series (secular)