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New Year's Resolutions: "Set Small Goals"
Updated: May 16, 2023
Before we begin this blog, I want to show you this journal entry I wrote three months ago that states the opposite of everything I am getting ready to tell you. Excuse the inartistic word vomit.
October 11, 2017
I don't have big dreams anymore.
I'm not who people say I am.
I'm not who I thought I was.
I'm just an adult who had cute, little big dreams.
The pressure to live an extraordinary life …
When your vision is as narrow
As what you will have for breakfast.
How do you see the world
Staring at a cereal bowl?
You're just like all the lazy people you dislike
And you dislike them because of it.
The allurement of distractions …
So your intentions
Will never take action.
Because be honest
You don't know where to start.
The steps to take are elusive, Abstract.
Inconveniences take root in your subconscious
As excuses
For never venturing beyond your kitchen counter.
How do you make time for dreams
When there are bills to pay
And jobs that don't pay them?
The impossibility of it all is crushing,
Weighing down on all you thought you could do.
Funny how your life seems to end
As soon as you think it's beginning.
There is no time, there is no love left,
And there is no room for pursuit.
I can't have big dreams anymore.
Under the crushing wait of leaving the inspirational environment of college and entering into the bill paying, life supporting, adult world of “life is hard,” those were my thoughts on dreams and goals three months ago. And those are the thoughts that will always continue to try to creep into my mind as an excuse to remain comfortable in my life. But none of these thoughts are true. For anyone. I have found that it is crucial to expand your limits if you want to find success, freedom, and happiness in your life.
With the start of the New Year among us, I see so many people setting goals that are so small and easily achievable, they can hardly be considered goals, or not even bothering to make resolutions at all. I think this is the most fitting time to address the problem of people thinking as lowly as they can, rather than as highly as they can for their lives. Where does this problem come from, and why is it considered a problem?
Why do people set small goals?
Big goals amount to more success. So why is setting small goals even a thing in the first place? Why do people limit themselves to such small achievements? I know that a little progress each day adds up. But, there needs to be a greater plan. I’m not talking about small goals in terms of taking steps in a plan to achieve larger goals. I’m talking about small goals in terms of that smallness being as high as you think you can reach in your life. Goals like writing one-hundred words a day, going to bed earlier, and eating a salad once a week are not goals. They are steps toward a higher goal like writing a book, living healthier, or losing weight. So why are we calling these baby steps “goals?”
People set small goals for themselves because it is way more comfortable to limit yourself where you don’t have to stretch outside of your comfort zone or do something different for too long. Setting small dreams is an excuse to not really change, so you don’t have to push very hard, and you can still praise yourself. It is a setup for reward even though you’ve improved accomplished nothing notable.
I’ve read articles, patting people on the back for making small New Year’s resolutions. Saying it is wise to cut back on our ambitions because we don’t thrive under the defeating feeling of “failure.” My solution to that would be to reconsider what failure is – another attempt towards your goal, that does not have any business defeating you. You never lose. You either win or you learn.
Setting small goals is also a safe way of looking motivated without fear of being judged for “fantasizing” about your ideal life. People are scared of the “come on, be serious,” “get real” judgement from their friends and family. It is socially acceptable to play by others’ small rules. But this glorification of achieving small goals is totally backwards. Your life isn’t their life. It’s yours. Don’t let other people run it. You can be as big as you work to be.
Why should we set big goals?
Instead of contenting ourselves with these small limits, why should we not see how far we can go? The point of a goal isn’t to know for a fact that we can reach it, no problem. Then it wouldn’t be a goal. The beauty of a goal seeming farfetched beyond your limits, is that it forces you to stretch yourself and uncap your potential. It proves you wrong. Joe Vitale says: “A goal should scare you a little, and excite you a lot.”
Look at it this way. Imagine you are trying to throw a ball from one end of a field to the other. What is the best approach? Are you going to continually throw the ball in tiny increments to get it across the field, because you know you can? Or are you going to chuck that ball as far as you possibly can and see how far it lands? If you look at it this way, setting small goals is pointless. Why not shoot out of the gate going as far as you can possibly go?
There is no life hack to success, there is no magic key that unlocks your door to the life you want. Just like you can’t get fit by wrapping your body in cling wrap and drinking a glass of wine or cucumber water instead of going to the gym. Those things are easy, and things worth doing aren’t easy. It takes pure hard work and grit to get where you want to be. In my opinion, listening to the articles that try to advise that small goals will make you happier is setting yourself up for a life of insignificance.
So write that book, become that fitness goddess, start that business, buy that car with your hard earned money, quit that addiction, get out of that debt, become that star, finish that degree. Do something big. Do something difficult. Do something worth doing. And don’t stop when it hurts. Stop when you’re done.
What does it take to follow through with big goals?
The hardest part of pursuing a large goal can be following through with it. Thus the reason why a lot of New Year’s resolutions fail. It is the grit and the daily hustle that keep goals going. You have to remember that the motivation for the daily hustle is not necessarily the goal itself, but the reason behind your goal. For instance, if your goal is to make more money. Your goal really isn’t just to have the money. It is what that money can bring you. Maybe you want the freedom to buy a new car, a nicer house, pay bills more easily, be able to go out to eat without breaking your bank. You have to keep your eye on that prize or you will lose the will to progress.
One more thing to watch out for is getting lost in taking the little steps towards your goal. Reaching each step in the process is important, and you must have a plan. But if you congratulate yourself too much for those tiny steps, you can become content with only your progress, and never see the end of what could have been, had you not been content with the few small steps you took. It is personally very easy for me to get caught in this, now that I am fresh out of college with a performing degree, working a performing job. It is difficult not to get stuck in the rut of feeling good where I am, and forfeiting practice and improving for bigger and better things because I already have a job. But I know that I cannot stagnate and miss out on a life full of opportunities that it is my job to jump into.
Shoot for the moon … Do you know where you’ll land?
“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” – Norman Vincent Peale
We may not all be destined to achieve the exact goal we’ve set out dreaming of. That goal may shift for you as you change along the journey to a life of success. But nonetheless, we are all capable of accomplishing something big. So try hard, and aim to go far, no matter what. Shoot for your dreams, so you will land somewhere among them. And never stop believing that you can do it.
“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” - Hebrews 11:1
